Reality Check

Living with a person with a disorganization/clutter problem is rarely easy since their behaviors are likely to affect you. Clutter often encroaches on shared family, often becomes a point of contention and can snowball out of control if allowed. While it may be difficult to do, it's important to be supportive and encourage the person who has this issue to seek help.

Here are a few tips on what to say to encourage someone to seek help:
1. I want the best for you.
2. You deserve to live a functional life.
3. I'll support you.
4. I won't judge you.
5. I understand that this may be difficult for you.
6. I understand that parting with your things is not easy, but I believe you can do it.

Here are few things NOT to say:
1. You need to clean this mess.
2. Why won't you clean this mess?
3. You need to stop living like a slob.
4. It's all your fault and you're on your own.
5. Stop being lazy.
6. Why don't you just throw it all away!!

This doesn't mean that you condone the living situation or should have to suffer in silence, but remember these points: Don't play the blame game-it doesn't work. Blaming yourself for their position or them for their situation is just a recipe for anger and resentment to build. Try not to become angry and speak from a place of rage. Remain calm and don't lash out with negative and hurtful words. Express your desire for the person to live a more organized life. Remember, most people do not truly desire to live this way, but may lack the skills and resources to change.